Hell Monkeys Who Scream At You For Doing A Math Problem Wrong

Based On Principle
4 min readApr 18, 2023

A few years ago, there was this trend where a lot of people were sharing this “lottery meme” which claimed that poverty would be solved by dividing the Powerball among 300 million people:

Unfortunately, the math is technically incorrect, and it would actually equal about $4.33 per person, instead of $4,330,000 per person. Bummer, right? So now, if you believed the meme at first, am I going to spend the rest of this article acting like some douchebag 5th grade teacher by reprimanding and ridiculing you for doing a math problem wrong? No, I’m not — but I will be talking about the plethora of people who would do exactly that.

What pisses me off the most isn’t the people who did the math problem wrong and shared the meme with good intentions. It’s an honest mistake, and I’m not going to start viciously chewing out and reprimanding people for doing a fucking math problem wrong. It’s fine. But what isn’t “fine” is all of the hell monkeys who want to scream at others and viciously mock them for doing a math problem wrong.

Think about it — do you really want to be friends with someone who is going to act like an obnoxious 5th grade teacher, and ruthlessly mock and ridicule you for doing a math problem wrong? Probably not. Now, I’m not going to lie; me and a few other people on my friends list fell for the meme at first, but once I realized that the math was incorrect, I was really chill about letting others know about it.

I distinctly recall going to my friend’s Facebook post sharing this and saying something along the lines of, “no offense, but the math is technically incorrect, it equals $4.33 per person”. See, it’s easy to correct people’s honest mistakes without acting like a total douche when they do a fucking math problem wrong. But what really got me aggravated was all of these self-righteous hell monkeys making all of these obnoxious posts horribly ridiculing those who did the math problem wrong.

Literally — there was this one person on my “friends” list who shared a meme of Batman hitting Robin, and Batman was saying, “It equals $4.33 per person, not $4,330,000 idiot!!”.

Really? She wants to hit somebody for doing a fucking math problem wrong? Why would you want to be friends with someone like…

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Based On Principle

Written works that reflect on a wide variety of topics, with some sort of "philosophical" angle to it. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Based0nPrinciple